ENEMIES…

“The Bible tells us to love our neighbors and also to love our enemies; probably because they are generally the same people.” — G. K. Chesterton

The spiritual program that I embrace makes me look to where I am, rather than where I want to be. I must live in the now, rather than the never-never-land of tomorrow.
To love my world I need to seek to understand those people who live in my world. To love my world involves an acceptance of those who are different from me. I must seek to build bridges, rather than barriers. It is so easy for me to talk about loving and being concerned for the starving millions and forgetting to love and relate to the typist in my office or the neighbor down the street.
I have some experience of people who can be difficult because I lived with the addicted me for many years; I am the key to my enemies.
Teach me to accept in love those who, for today, I do not like.

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I can very easily get caught up in telling others how to love their neighbor & forget to do it myself…When Jesus said love my neighbor he wasn’t just talking about the guy next door…But the jerk S.O.B. that just cut me off in traffic…That is where true love your neighbor comes into play…I need to remember that just because someone does something I don’t approve of doesn’t give me the right to not love them…Christ died for my sins 2000 years before I committed them…That’s how much He loves me…Till next time…

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Dear friend of Bill W.,

Through A.A., we can experience freedom from self.
After all, it was self (you, me) that stood in our own
way, that ran the show and ran ourselves into
bankruptcy, that hurt the ones we loved. All Twelve
Steps of A.A. are designed to kill the old self
(deflate the old ego) and build a new free self.

from page 459 of the Big Book, 3rd edition

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First off let me apologize for not posting for awhile…

My computer crashed & it took 9 days to get it back from the shop…That was a few days ago but I have been trying to catch up with all the info I lost on the hard drive…

When today’s reading talks about the 12 steps killing the old self…For me that is so true…But my old self really needed killing…Besides being hell bent on my destruction thru pills & booze…I really hated…loathed myself…Through the steps I have learned not only to like myself…But to love myself as well…I was really able to look inside me on the 4th step & see my character defects…Then 5, 6 & 7 helped me to put those defects in God’s hands & be set free...The rest of the steps have helped me to grow as a person & to give back to my community…Till next time

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Father Leo’s Daily Meditation

PROCRASTINATION

“You cannot build a reputationon things you are going to do.”
– Mabel Newcomber

Procrastination is the addicts’ game. I will give up alcohol tomorrow.
Soon I will take an inventory of my eating habits. Later I will talk to
him about my anger and pain. Tomorrow and tomorrow — but it
never happens!

The tragedy is that we not only bring pain and problems into our lives
but we keep them there. Recovery requires action; sobriety and the
spiritual program demand movement.

Today I will talk about my pain.

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I ask a lot of people if they know what happens to people who procrastinate…Nothing…I was & to a degree am still a horrible procrastinator…Why do today what I can put off till tomorrow…But AA & the 12 steps have really helped me deal with this problem…I found that when I started doing a consistent 10th step every night…no matter what…(I might interject here that sometimes I fall asleep while doing it & wake up in the morning with unrecognizable ink marks on the page) I discovered a discipline that has helped me in many different areas of my life…Procrastination being at the top of the list…Forcing myself to do my writing every night has been a great tool…Till next time…

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Keep It Simple

I’m always ready to learn, although I do not always like being taught.—Winston Churchill
We addicts are used to learning the hard way. Many of us think we’re different and can do things our own way. But then we get in too much trouble or pain. The first AA members were just like us. They knew how it is to hate being told what to do. So they suggested we follow the Twelve Steps. They didn’t say we have to do anything. They didn’t say working  the Steps is the only way to live sober. They just said the Steps worked for them. we’re finding out that the Steps work for us too. We don’t have to work them.
We don’t have to stay sober. We just like our new sober life better than our old drinking  or drugging life.
And we learned how to live this new life by working the Steps
Prayer for the Day: Higher Power, help me be open to your lessons. Teach me gently and help me listen.
Action for the Day: I will list five ways that I get in the way of my own learning.

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I generally don’t like learning…It usually has to do with pain…For it is seldom I learn much without pain…Until then I am unwilling to listen…I always say after a learning spree that next time I won’t wait so long but then yet again…I wait till I hurt…Theoretically I should know anytime bad times arrive that I have a learning opportunity but when I get there I do everything in my power to make it stop…I don’t generally make resolutions but my Goal for this year is to accept times of difficulty & try to learn as much as I can…Till next time…

In our addiction, we didn’t care. We didn’t care about other people, even though we wanted to. We just didn’t come through for them in ways that mattered. We didn’t care for ourselves. We let bad things happen to us. We didn’t care about living. We set no goals, had no fun, smelled no flowers.
In our recovery, we do care. We care about others, ourselves, and life. Our spirits are on the move again.
There’s life in our hearts. Our bodies are getting well. And we’re daring to dream. We’re living!
Prayer for the Day:  Higher Power, put some life and energy into me today. Help me love my new life.
Action for the Day:  Today, I’ll focus on being alive. As I breathe in, I’ll gather more and more life energy from nature.

The only courage that matters
is the kind that gets you from
one moment to the next.
– Mignon McLaughlin

May I avoid the temptation to seek the fantasy of tomorrow for the reality of today.

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One of my most favorite passages in the Bible is “Don’t borrow trouble from tomorrow…Today has enough troubles of it’s own”

And that is the truth…There is no need to worry about tomorrow because we are not guaranteed we’ll even get there & no way to know what tomorrow will actually hold

If I live in today or actually this moment I have some idea of what I need to deal with…Problems in today need to be dealt with & if part of that needs to be put off till later then that is what you have to do & then attend to them when they come back up…Worry is a tool from the pits of Hell & that is the only place worry will get you…The 1st thing to do when you feel uncertain is to Pray…It is our best defense…Till next time…

Self-acceptance.
At the beginning of our AA sobriety, we were reminded that we were not reformers. Yet we sometimes have a tendency to want to “reform” ourselves or others after we’ve established sobriety.
This can become a practice of “fixing things that aren’t broken”. We may not realize it, but many things in our lives and personalities were always all right, all along. In believing that we should be changed, we may be taking on the opinions of someone else. There might be no need for change at all.
We also may be trying to please people who disapproved of us. Perhaps we’re trying to obtain the affection of a parent who always rejected us. But if we’re already on a spiritual path and are living rightly, there’s no need for change. We’d be trying to fix something that isn’t broken.
I’ll accept myself and others as we are today. We are not out to reform anyone, including ourselves.

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When we do our 4th step we look deeply at ourselves…Somethings are hard to look at…We don’t like that part of ourselves…So in those areas we try to repair the damage…But what about the areas that aren’t broken…What of those…This is what this reading is talking about & there are many aspects of ourselves that are fine…In fact good…These are the areas where we found we didn’t have a part in the resentment or that our character defects were not there…We also found in our 9th step that with a lot of people we have very redeeming qualities…It was our disease they didn’t like not us…Self appraisal can be & is very valuable…An honest look at ourselves is often just what we need & like the reading say…Don’t fix what isn’t broken…Till next time

Do not waste any time disliking who you are because of something you can no longer do anything about. Lord, help me to forgive myself all shortcomings of the past that I still hold on to and rather make the very best of this moment.

We never really know how far reaching our influence will be. Lord, may Your loving kindness always flow through me.

All animals, except man, know
that the ultimate of life is to
enjoy it.
– Samuel Butler

Today I choose to enjoy my life. Regardless of the problem and difficulties that this
day will bring, I have an inner joy that comes with my recovery from addiction. With a
clear head and body free from drugs and chemicals I can face today and look forward
to tomorrow. My life is to be enjoyed not endured. My worst days today are better
than my best days as an addict. Spiritually I am free because I have begun to
discover me. God can now be perceived in His world because I have sobriety.

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My routine used to be drink as late as posible & then pass out…Sleep as late as possible & come to

My first thought was “Oh God…not another day” I would then put on my flannel pants…Drive to the liquor

store & buy the next days supply…Everyday…Today I don’t do things that way anymore…I embrace life…

I don’t have to hide from the day with liquor & pills…The first thought in my head when I wake up is…

“Thank you God for another day” & I notice that I always seem to have a smile on my face when I wake up…

AA & my higher power(God) have made all this possible…especially now in the holiday season…Merry Christmas

to you…I enjoy life to it’s fullest…What used to be the worst time of the year for me is now one of the best…Sobriety

is wonderful & I recommend it to everyone…till next time…